Your unique strength is that you live in the heart of relationship and are the world's best friend.
Here’s why you are an Earth Angel and how you can use your unique strength to help heal your abandonment issues:
Your nurturing nature also means that your tendency is to focus on others and put your needs last. It’s a survival pattern that helps you feel valuable.
Nothing wrong with helping others! But your outpouring of heartfelt giving can leave you depleted, empty-handed, unappreciated and feeling hurt or resentful.
Giving and receiving in relationships is woven into the everyday fabric of life. But heaven help those who don’t learn how to do it in a balanced way. Like many things in life, the heart has blind spots.
Deep down, there may be hidden needs you are doing your best to fill - but in a way that ultimately cannot work.
How did this pattern develop?
Maybe something like this (with goodness and innocence)
~ You are drawn to the warmth of love like a puppy cuddling in a litter.
~ When you were a child, there may have been caregivers who couldn’t meet your need for loving presence.
~ You innocently took on the role of being a loving presence and helping others. You suppressed your own needs (since no one was able to meet them, anyway).
~ Eventually, your generosity ended up with you neglecting authentic self-care and self-respect.
~ This creates a neediness that you can’t fill with more giving.
~ Hidden resentments build as your needs continue to be unfilled.
How can you be in the natural flow of give and take when you deny your own needs?
Some possible (and frustrating) dynamics are:
Being so relationship oriented, why don’t your relationships work out better?
How can being an Earth Angel go so wrong?
Because healthy, sustainable relationships require two healthy,
sustainable (self-nurturing) firmly grounded human (NOT angelic) adults.
Habitually focusing on the needs of others and on relationships
may mean you have blocks around:
Knowing what to do to fulfill your own needs
Your connection with your True Self, or "higher" self, or inner guidance
Your beautiful desire for happiness in relationship may include patterns that sabotage you.
“When we realize that real happiness lies within us,
we will know that everything outside of us is just a play.”
Amma (Mata Amritanandamayi, the hugging saint)
Accept that you don’t have to TRY to create love.
In fact, trying to give, get or create love is proof that you believe there is LACK of love, including love that is for you. The belief might sound like this:
"Life lacks love unless you drain yourself out for everyone
(but you don’t get any for yourself).”
Is that the message you want to send? How would this feel instead?
“Life IS love and I love myself (and you and everyone)
and there’s plenty of love and it simply is.”
Not convinced? Does it seem too simple? Try this little experiment:
Acknowledging your pain and disconnect is actually bringing you into true PRESENCE -
with what is real in this moment. It brings you into depth. It allows you to receive kindness.
Have compassion for yourself that what you want is good and beautiful.
Resolve to shift the patterns that hinder your balanced flow of love with yourself and in relationships.
Remember - as an EARTH ANGEL, Earth comes first!
Imagine that instead of attending Hogwarts :-) you attended Earth Angel University.
Do you imagine you would get lessons in how to neglect your needs? Maybe you can imagine you received these sorts of lessons:
For me to fulfill my purpose, I will need:
I will need support and help.
I will need a shoulder to cry on sometimes.
I will need to to acknowledge my “weaknesses.”
I need to learn what will help me be the best helper possible.
I will need to learn how to be receptive to love and support.
What are the many ways that love and support can appear?
I need to appreciate where I’d be without support.
I need to humbly accept how Grace operates in my life.
I need to see when I act as if I can (or should) do it all.
I need to be the kind of helper I would I want my children to be.
Here you are on planet Earth. A HUMAN Earth Angel. How do you enjoy loving the world? How are you already living your purpose of loving the world?
Are you taking into your heart how much YOU benefit from being you?
Are you respecting yourself? None of this happens without you, so please take incredibly good care of yourself
AND take great care to understand that what you need in relationships is self-care and balanced give and take. Remember that ‘saint’ is not your job title (who wants to be in relationship with a saint anyway?)
Ground yourself in the reality of human egos, including your own. There is no perfection, only progress in the human realm, and we cannot foresee how life is supposed to be evolving.
Remember that relationships are human agreements. It is your job to value what you have to offer as precious--so negotiate agreements that sustain you.
The happiness of others is not your responsibility, but YOU ARE. Take care of yourself first so that you CAN share your divine love with the world.
Acknowledge that love is unconditional, it exists apart from any conditions - it is not dependent on relationships or sacrifice.
Be humble - you are not “god” and you do not know what is best.
I hope by now that you recognize how being in “output mode” for others is not sustainable. And that nurturing yourself is an inside job.
Your true need (true for all of us) is to take a stand for your own SACRED SELFISHNESS.
Just as a person needs air to breathe,
the soul needs to be nurtured with love and care. ~Amma~
Hi, I’m Laura
Life is constantly unfolding and there’s always opportunities for more healing, well being, AND healthy relationships.
We have the power to claim what’s natural for us as human beings.
We know something's not right when things are ugly, twisted and small. We also know that we can love, trust, express our inner selves, enjoy stability, and be embraced by a community.
Trust your heart, it’s time to make a choice. Trust that you are not a victim of your outer circumstances.
My life experiences made me who I am today. I have excellent relationships with my parents (my mother and I couldn't get along for decades) and I made peace with the fact that my son has a difficult path.
Not to mention, I met my current husband (14 years in 2019) (possibly the most loving, generous,gentle, stable, nurturing, likable guy on this planet) the moment I decided to accept my failures and own my power to heal, to love and to do what it takes to be happy.
After 18 years, Resonance Repatterning™ still has the power to drop me to my knees in awe and gratitude. It, combined with sessions with clients over hundreds of sessions, has truly healed me.
To err is human. So is to heal, to hope, and to love.
Now it’s your turn…
It’s up to you to invest in yourself. Self-worth and self-respect is an inside job. Nobody can give it to you. Choose to heal from the inside out.
If you’re reading this you know you want something better. Trust your heart and find a way. You, and only you, have the power to invite it into your life.
Doesn't it make sense that what finally helps is something "out of the box?"