Unresolved relationship issues from the past trigger a "life or death" intensity of reactions because your rational mind is literally bypassed. You go into an ancient pattern of survival. You can lose your ability to think, get centered or communicate.
This is super tough to deal with because there is shame around your behaviors. Most people have been judged and rejected about it in heart-breaking ways. That becomes shame about who they are...AND that won't help!
Before we look at the underlying causes and cures:
What can cause this kind of getting stuck in over-reactions?
A combination of your loving, passionate nature, your deep desire for connected relationships, and past traumas.
Past traumas can be from relationship wounds, needs not being met or even neglect or abuse. When you feel upset, you literally cannot think straight. You can't communicate well. You can't get things resolved. You may have been in relationship with a reactive person in your childhood.
Reactions cut off the ability to learn and grow but my holistic healing approach can:
Suspicion and distrust can make you feel crazy but I promise you are not. Think about this:
MOST songs and movies about love are "done me wrong songs."
MOST marriages end in divorce
MANY people cheat.
How many people have you seen get hurt?
The simple truth is...you'd be crazy not to have concerns! So what to do?
The solution is not an overnight fix by any means. BUT I CAN HELP YOU:
Experience trusting the unfolding life process of challenges and growth that is life, love, and relationships. Wonderful...highly recommended!
A LOT of my clients - the ones who search online for healing abandonment issues - are those who give.
And their hearts have been broken because their unconscious strategy for DESERVING love blew up in their face. Again.
I help them learn to love and take care of themselves. It sounds easy but...
This is tricky because they truly have generous hearts but they can fall in the trap of a false sense of personal abundance.
They may be so focused outside themselves they don't see their own needs and they end up being needy but unable to see it or deal with it.
Theirelationships have a strange way of only going so far...
We can all fall into that trap if we aren't careful, even if we have a healthy selfishness! It is unconscious and we do it to ourselves! It takes a deep inner shift, a new paradigm, a radical honesty. And trusting "life and the universe" to take care of it's own (without us having to do it).
I help people release the patterns, beliefs and fears that uphold this pattern. And to shift into what is healthy and sustainable - so they can attract the long-term healthy, committed relationship they need and deserve.